Maybe I…

Maybe I should have let life
harden me till nothing gets
out or in
Maybe I should set a table
for the notion that
the kind of love I serve
will never pull up a chair
and sit beside me
Maybe I should give up on
my fairy tale dreams
and read my real story
Maybe I should stop expecting
happy endings and just
expect endings
Maybe there are those who
are meant to be alone…
maybe I’m one of them…
Go on, Life, have your way.
My battle against you
has
been
proven
bottomless.
Make me hard where I am soft
Make me cold where I am warm
Make me dead where I dream
Change who I am…
just protect me from hope.

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13 responses to “Maybe I…

  1. Just when I was at one of my lowest points, I happened on Mocha’s blog and read the following article, http://liveuntil.com/2013/05/04/catching-pebbles/, which led me to Tric’s blog where I found this, http://mythoughtsonapage.com/2013/05/03/miracle-or-coincidence/.

    Just when I was ready to give up and in, hope snuck back in. I don’t know what I will do with it yet, but Mocha’s ripple found me this morning and I am thankful to both him and Tric.

  2. Scandalous, never give up on your dreams…like I say…it is the ultimate betrayal of self…be the soft warm dreamer that you are…

  3. This is obviously reflecting your morning sadness. Life can be so very hard, sad and lonely. Believe me I have had a very difficult journey through life, and have no idea how I survived it, but I did. As a result I see life as a place I love to be. Not every day but often. I really believe if you have never known true desperation and sadness you can never really appreciate happiness. I do hope you get to be happy. Never give up, I think that is what saved me, I never did. You are a fantastic writer and have a great eye for the world around you. I love to read your posts and look forward to them. I follow quite a few bloggers but there are some I would miss. You are one of them.

    • Thank you, Tric. That means a lot to me. I did write a followup to Maybe I… I know these feelings will pass. Sometimes loneliness dogs me and makes me feel unlovable even when I know it isn’t true. Your comment makes me feel better. It really does. Thank you so much!

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